After it was certain that my marriage was over was when it really set in, I looked in the mirror and had no clue what I was looking at. After The Dominator was born I weighed 120 LB’s… So how did I go from 120 to 170?? I was 19 when I had the kid and then 25 when I finally looked in the damn mirror. It took 6 years to destroy my body… I knew that if I didn’t stop then it was only going to get harder (and how was I going to find a hottie?!) So how do I lose weight the right way- to you know have the flat stomach with a nice round ass? I started to do some research.. “In order to achieve a flat stomach big booty you have to eat 900 calories a day and squat for 567 hours per day, no rest!” OKAY… Well for someone who normally eats 3 plates of spaghetti for dinner with 3 cookies and milk to follow that’s easier said than done. So I started small.. I jogged one time around my block…..
So along with my “run” (walk) around the block I just started to eat less. Instead of 5 plates of food I just had one helping instead of having a donut and coffee for my snack I switched over to a yogurt with berries. So of course I lost about 20 LB’s.. Now that I saw some progress I thought about joining a gym. I lived in Las Vegas at the time so the hip spot was LVAC… Las Vegas Athletic Club.. So I got on the phone made an appointment and called.. They said “we’ve got everything you need and more to help you get fit”
When I pulled up the place looked scary… very very very scary.. and expensive… I was thinking it most cost to $150 a month to be a member at this fancy “Athletic Club”…. So I went on the tour and I was totally sold on the fact that women had their own private gym inside the club. That was exciting because there was no way in hell I wanted any of those buff sexy guys watching my ass try and figure out the weight machines. So long story short it was only $29.95 a month that included day care. I just had to sign mylife away for 365 days. SOLD!!!! Well I ended up moving back to the good old sunshine state and didn’t want to stop my fitness journey but I wasn’t ready for the gym yet, so I went back to running. I got settled into my apartment- I ended up at a big local chain gym and started training. I got sold on a Bikini Competitor’s life and that started my journey to BODY COMPLEX HELL… Like seriously, hell. I never thought dieting and exercise could hurt somebody. I was so scared of carbs and fat that I was starving myself because I wanted to look a certain way. Thank you sweet baby Jesus that it was only a “short” lived “phase” I use “” because I may be using those terms lightly. I snapped out of the obsession and wanted to try crossfit because it looked fun.. Right.. Flipping tires, lifting weights, doing extreme burpees and doing monkey tricks on bars.. I’VE GOT THIS.. So I found this local gym.. Crossfit Battle Cry..
As cheesey as it may sound, but when I joined crossfit my whole life changed. My body image issuews slowly went away. I had to start eating because crossfit is no joke. I put on good weight and lost the bad kind. Toned up and decided to start competing in local competitions for fun.
Anyways – I just wanted to share a short but semi-sweet background… Getting to where I am now should have been a whole blog in itself and I should have started a long time ago. I don’t think my story is unique or anything.. I just think by me spreading awareness on how the strong survive can’t be too much of wasted internet space…. right??
That is an MRI of my brain… and what you are looking at is called a:
Chairi Malformation; A condition in which brain tissue extends into the spinal canal.
My life revolves around lifting weights.. So now I have to be VERY careful how I lift weights and do crossfit. I am fortunate to have a great support group around me to help me modify movements and cheer me on even though I feel handicapped. My biggest daily struggles are with pain, my speech and my balance. *I AM A FALL RISK*
The answer to my problem is decompression surgery… that pretty much means a brain lift… maybe I’m’ being dramatic but that pretty much sums it up…
What in the world am I going to do?
I am so scared.. Each day is a new journey and it really feels like I’m battling my body all day every day. And we all know what they say…